What the fuck is wrong with people who think they have to jam all sorts of crappy products into their orifices just to enjoy themselves? I remember the first time Jay and I were with LingLing she brought this tube of Anal Eaze because she was really nervous about having anal sex. It didn’t do her any good. That stuff was nasty! Needless to say, Ling Ling’s ass didn’t get any action that night. Years later, though, she was able to enjoy anal sex, and she didn’t need the stupid-ass product to do it.
All of the stuff that’s supposed to numb parts of your body so you can perform sex acts is wrong and unnatural. You’re supposed to feel when you’re having sex. Isn’t that the point? If you give in to the fear of pain, you deny yourself the pleasure of the act.
The key to amazing anal and oral sex is foreplay: lick, suck, get it all wet with spit and juices, probe, spank, talk dirty. Our bodies relax and allow penetration when it’s at play. Trust your body. We are meant for pleasure.
Speaking of safe sex, take it from these puppets:
Smut I’m reading on Kindle for iPhone: “The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty,” by A.N. Roquelaure.
Short bits of naughty reading: This past Thursday was Dirty Haiku Day at Susie Bright’s Journal.
Violet Blue posted a call for submissions for Best Women’s Erotica 2011. I’m really enjoying Best Women’s Erotica 2010. If you’re looking for short naughty stories to read in bed, go get this paperback.
P.S. How do you feel about Christina Ricci? Hot or not? (via @Be_Better_Guys)
Jay found my scene with Max Hardcore on a porn tube site. Most large porn companies don’t like the tube sites because users upload videos without permission, and I assume without royalties to the producers of the videos. Some porn companies even blame the tube sites for slumping DVD sales.
Jay really likes those tube sites, though. He is trying to convince me to post to them because they’re so popular and a good way to get new traffic (though I wonder, with the amount of free content on those sites, how many people are really clicking out).
It is kind of like the Napster of porn. Porn producers can take the tube sites down legally one at a time, or embrace it and figure out a way to earn royalties from them.
What do you think? Do you watch porn on the tube sites? How do you feel about them?
While you’re thinking about it, here is my scene with Max Hardcore, as embedded from XVideos.com:
Get your fuck on, it’s Friday!!!
I’ve got 5 XXX videos homeburned on a DVD for whomever comes up with the best caption for this photo. Your comment should be stamped by Monday, February 8 to qualify for this contest.
All 5 XXX Videos and the photo above are in MAYCAM XXX Archive.
Good Vibrations, I’m awfully fond of you… (originally posted February 3, 2003)
… doo doo doo bee doo… I just got back from Good Vibrations. They have a “hands-on” workshop on giving a hand job. It was fun stroking dildos a gazillion ways with a sexy group of mostly women (and a couple of men). I can’t wait to practise on the geeb. Good Vibes is like a candy store to me. I couldn’t resist bringing a little rubber duckie vibrator home. It fits perfectly in my bathroom where I have an extensive rubber duckie collection. Now I can sit in the tub and sing, “Rubber duckie, you’re the one! You make bathtime lots of fun! Rubber duckie, I am awfully fond of you… doo doo doo bee doo…”
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I still have this Rubber Duckie vibe. Actually, not this one. A new one. I had to replace it when it finally died a couple of years ago. It lived long and worked hard. I loved it so much that I had to buy the exact same one after it died. Good Vibes still has them. Maybe I should stock up now.
When I was pregnant I had a dream: the Madonna with a Freddie Mercury mustache was holding my baby. In my dream the baby was covered with a pink blanket, so I thought it was a dream about the gender of my baby. Then I thought, Freddie Mercury… is my baby going to be GAY? I don’t know that yet. But right now I can tell that my vision of Freddie Mercury means that our child is an amazing musician, a prodigy even. Rock on, everybody!
In world news, Aussies want to ban small breasted women in porn. Apparently small breasted women promote pedophilia. In Australia, only full breasted women have the right to be sexy. The rest of us flat chested women can just hide in shame under our miracle bras, feel guilty about promoting child abuse unwittingly, or get a boob job if we feel like rebelling against the horrible lot our genes have imposed on us. Aussies also want to ban squirters. Just because they’re freaks. Don’t they know only guys ejaculate? (via @joycesu)
What an interesting line drawing: nori bondage from German graffiti and street artist, Boris Hoppek.
Aging is inevitable. Despite the false promises of cosmetic surgery, there is no escaping it. Time will have its way with us. The only escape is Death. Who’s luckier, the ones who live long enough to age, or the ones who died young?
Timothy Greenfield-Sanders is showing portraits of Supermodels from the 1970s and 1980s taken in 2009. Timothy writes: “I have always been interested in how we deal with aging in our hopelessly youth oriented society. These beautiful and amazing women, now in their fifties, were once the reigning queens of American beauty, and the ultimate icons of world-wide marketing.” The exhibit is at the Steven Kasher Gallery in NYC from January 28 to February 27.
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My first job after graduating from college was as a social worker in a nursing home. I was 20 years old and I spent 8 hours of my day with people 4 times my age. I sat with them and talked with them about their lives. They showed me photos of themselves when they were young and told me their stories. I met a former CIA agent (she was senile, so I couldn’t get any stories from her), veterans of World War 2, farmers, housewives, journalists. Their generation saw the most change in the history of humankind. Born in the early 20th century, they were alive through the two World Wars, and witnessed the accelerated pace of technological innovation that was characteristic of the 20th and 21st centuries.
Spending a year working in a nursing home taught me to see the person, not the age. Often I enjoyed the company of old people more than people my age who worked at the nursing home. It was the stories! I’m a sucker for good stories.
At that moment I decided I would make it my mission to live an exciting story. Someday I will be old, and when that happens, I want to have amazing stories to tell.
Here’s a video Jay sent me of an old lady who reminisces about her past, amid flashbacks of footage of her in 70s porn. The old woman is Georgina Spelvin, star of 70s classic The Devil in Miss Jones. Soundtrack: Massive Attack’s, “Paradise Circus”.
Massive Attack Paradise Circus from sabakan on Vimeo.
I uploaded almost 400 flow photos, distributed among 14 galleries in the OMP Members Area. These are photos taken between 2002 and 2003, when I was actively documenting my periods monthly, and a few straggling photos from 2005.
I have a few more videos to go through, but I believe I’m going to rest now. I’ve noticed a big drop in my energy level the past few days. It’s part of my cycle, and I’ve learned to take it easy so I don’t get grumpy. Often, what women call PMS is nothing more than stress and overwork at a time when our bodies want us to slow down.
