May Ling Su

I’m back in California, feeling the sand between my toes, watching the surfers ride the Pacific waves, making my beautiful home my own.

Some highlights from the yellow brick road:

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Jay took this yesterday. That’s me plugging in when we arrived at our apartment.

We’ve been so busy. The wee one loves the subway. My feet hurt.

After living in the middle of the woods for the past year, I can’t sleep through the noise. I remember living in NYC and having a hard time sleeping in total silence whenever I was anywhere else.

Tucked away at the end of NYC’s Indian row is a place called Milon. Jefferson turned me on to it. He said, there will be men in front enticing us to come into other restaurants, but only go to Milon.

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Man-o-man, I haven’t updated in a while. This is like bumping into my best friend after a very long time. I have way too much news to break for one entry. My hair is short, as you can see. Jay chopped it off in a fit of rage. No, just kidding. I wanted a bob. Do you like my Bob?

I made this sexy top and panties out of Jay’s old t-shirt. I love it! Do you?

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It was Jay’s birthday. I had invited all our friends to a surprise picnic barbecue at Snug Harbor. Everyone turned out on that hot sunny day. It was also a farewell party. Jay and I were moving to California.

We ran around tossing a green giant ball across the lawn. I remember Beth’s long legs moving lithely under a tiny plaid schoolgirl skirt, braids hopping as she caught the ball and threw it back. (Beth was at the time Mitchell’s girl. He couldn’t make it to the party, but she came anyway.) Keith took his shirt off, running after the ball, self-made tattoos gleaming in the sun. All our cheeks and shoulders were pink that day.

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Jay set up a blanket and pillows on our backyard deck. Reminds me of those times in New York City when he’d take me out to the roof or the porch on a really hot night and we’d fuck all night under the stars.

We’re both coughing and sneezing, and the cool night air helps clear out the sinuses. I bundled up in blankets and cuddled with him on the deck. The baby monitor is on, humming white noise. Everything is damp from the lagoon mist, but it’s so rare that we find the time and space to fuck loudly, so we don’t care. I let it out while I took it in the ass. Jay seemed to go on forever.

Tonight, we’re watching Thinking XXX on TV. I’ve been seeing the previews on HBO for a few weeks now. Even caught a glimpse of my red plaid skirt. It’s on at 11:00 PM on HBO-East and then again at 2:00 AM on HBO-West.

Saturday, October 30, there’s an art opening for Timothy’s portraits at the Mary Boone Gallery, and then an After Party we were invited to… but we’re grounded here in California…

God! I wish I still lived in New York City, so if I was feeling good on that day I could just walk to the gallery, and the party… and shmooze with porn stars and rock stars with my big belly hanging out.

The doc stuck her finger in my cooch today and said my cervix hasn’t yet dilated. I’m within the full-term pocket but I still have to wait.

I have no regrets about having a baby at this time. There are so many exciting events we’re sitting out because of my pregnancy, but it’s worth it. Call me crazy but having a monkey baby is really important to me. I just know I have an amazing child inside me.

In the meantime, Jay and I are fucking like crazy people. My midwife says that oxytocin, the natural hormone that brings labor contractions on, is produced during sex. Once water breaks, though, we can’t be penetrating my cunt anymore to avoid infection. We’re just gonna have to stimulate me in other ways… and I’ve got a few ideas in mind.

I heard about this project from Museum of Sex Curator, Grady Turner. He said it would be interesting to have me and Jay sit for a portrait. He introduced me to Jordan Schaps, the producer. At this point, none of us have met in person. All by email, we started making arrangements for our sitting.

We were originally scheduled to do it at Timothy Greenfield-Sanders‘ studio in New York City. Jay and I were coming out to the East Coast for a vacation, but at the last minute we canceled. Jay had a weird feeling about flying East at that time, and I always trust his intuition.

Months later, Jordan got in touch with me again, this time letting me know they were shooting in LA. It was only a few days notice, but LA is just a couple of hours by plane. So we went.

As soon as I walked into the studio, I was greeted by Timothy’s warm handshake. Jordan said something about being more beautiful in person, which put me immediately at ease. We looked through the polaroids they’ve shot so far. Someone mentioned that Nina Hartley was expected to turn up that afternoon.

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