Category: Blog

Love & Sex in the Chinese Year of the Water Rabbit

Happy Year of the Water Rabbit! Aligned with the Moon Goddess, Rabbit pounds the elixir of immortality with a mortar and pestle, symbolizing hope, peace, and longevity.

If you don’t already know which of the 12 zodiac animals you belong to, check the wheel below for the animal that corresponds to your birth year. If you were born on the month of January, it might get a little tricky for you. Since the Chinese go by the Lunar Calendar, some or all of January goes under the previous year’s sign. Here is a Chinese Animal Zodiac Sign Calculator to find out exactly what your sign is.

Do you know which animal zodiac sign you are? Then here are my Love & Sex Fortunes 🥠 for your amusement.

Rat: 1924, 1936, 1948, 1960, 1972, 1984, 1996, 2008, 2020

Dear Rats, I am sorry to say that luck in love and relationships will elude you in the Year of the Water Rabbit. Single Rats keep finding undesirable qualities in the people they date. Focus on self-love and decisiveness, whether you are single or partnered. If you are in a relationship, be attentive to your lover’s needs and your own. Explore your sexuality and sharpen your communication skills to make your fantasies come true.

Most compatible signs: Ox is that strong sexy complement to your personality. Dragon and you are a power couple. Monkey makes you so giddy happy.

Least compatible: Don’t hitch your wagon on Horse. Nothing you do will ever be good enough. Goat just wants your money. Rabbit can’t help but do the opposite of what you want. Beware!

Ox: 1925, 1937, 1949, 1961, 1973, 1985, 1997, 2009, 2021

Ox, you are doing so well this year. Hard work in your career is paying off and people are starting to pay attention. Single oxen, when you meet someone who meets your high standards, express yourself quickly and confidently before someone else makes their move. Nurture your love relationships, new and old. Don’t be stubborn over minor issues. Think of the big picture. Find a way to compromise in bed.

Most compatible signs: Rat balances your rigid personality. Snake is romantic and supportive of your work. Rooster will love you with loyalty.

Least compatible: You will clash with Goat. Horse has too much of a free spirit to take you seriously. You have nothing in common with Dog. Don’t waste your time.

Tiger: 1926, 1938, 1950, 1962, 1974, 1986, 1998, 2010, 2022

Tigers, make the most of your popularity this year by expressing your affection for those you are attracted to. Allow yourself to be vulnerable instead of your usual tactic of playing it cool. This also applies to partnered Tigers. Take a chance on letting your partner in on your secret desires. This year your charm can sway your partner to help make your fantasies a reality.

Most compatible signs: Pig may be your opposite but you can really be yourselves with each other. Horse is irresistible to you. Dog brings out your gentle side.

Least compatible: Monkey and you will always argue. A relationship with Snake will be full of suspicions and coldness. Stay away.

Rabbit: 1927, 1939, 1951, 1963, 1975, 1987, 1999, 2011, 2023

Rabbits exude a quiet confidence and strength. Despite being attractive socializers, you tend to be secretive and have your mind on the moon. You need lovers who will surprise you every so often to spice things up. Single rabbits, start a new relationship to keep you grounded in this turbulent year. If you are in a relationship, make sure you clarify any murky friendships to avoid jealousy from your partner.

Most compatible: Dog will be happy to live a peaceful life with you. Pig and you have a lot in common. Goat needs you and you love taking care of that horny Goat.

Least compatible: Rooster and you will argue about the littlest things. Dragon and you may seem like you have a lot in common but alas, you two clash. Rat is tricky, too, because it will take time before differences between you will appear and by then, it will be impossible to agree on anything.

Dragon: 1928, 1940, 1952, 1964, 1976, 1988, 2000, 2012

Dragons, both single and partnered, focus on your listening and empathy skills. Try to see things from your love’s point of view. Instead of blasting fire at your partner, extinguish your anger and speak to your lover with respect, tact, and care. Avoid dwelling on the past. Stay in the present moment and let that fire inside you propel you toward a better future.

Most compatible: Rooster worships you and will do anything for you. Monkey and you are a creative explosion together, just watch out for Monkey’s tricks. Rat’s humor and reliability attracts your stubborn nature.

Least compatible: You and Dog can’t understand or trust each other. Rabbit and you have similarities, but you can only tolerate each other to a certain point. You also clash with other Dragons. There can only be one!

Snake: 1941, 1953, 1965, 1977, 1989, 2001, 2013

Single Snakes, the Year of the Water Rabbit is a good time to master your temperament. Once you do this, you will attract the kind of lover you want in life. Partnered Snakes, don’t exhaust yourself arguing over insignificant matters. Anger is a venom that will poison you. Breathe… if it does not matter, let it go. Use that sexy tongue for whispering sweet nothings and for pleasuring your lover.

Most compatible: Monkey and you have similarities. You admire Rooster’s good taste and ability to avoid getting eaten up by you. Ox grounds you and is a reliable anchor.

Least compatible: Tiger is too suspicious and cold. Pig will tolerate you, but can’t trust you. I mean, you’re a Snake! And admittedly, Pig is good eatin’!

Horse: 1942, 1954, 1966, 1978, 1990, 2002, 2014

Horses, the Year of the Water Rabbit will be smooth for you. Single Horses will be lucky in finding love. If you are partnered, look to the future with your lover. You have found your ride-or-die. You can trust and let yourself be reined in. Would you consider being tied up in erotic bondage? Perhaps you are ready to make those plans for marriage, children, or retirement together.

Most compatible: Goat’s tenderness will make you feel content. Tiger will try hard to win you. Dog will be your loyal partner.

Least compatible: Rat will clash with you. Save yourselves the pain. Ox will be difficult to communicate with. Other Horses are great to work with but too similar to be compatible in love.

Goat: 1943, 1955, 1967, 1979, 1991, 2003, 2015

Goats, watch out for a disastrous romance in the Year of the Water Rabbit. Play the field if you are single. Partnered Goats should also play it safe. Things may not be optimum, but avoid tipping the scale for the worse. Be grateful for what you have, you horny beast.

Most compatible: Horse makes up for your shortcomings, and vice versa. Rabbit is dependable. Pig is warm and gentle.

Least compatible: Ox and you can be so stubborn and uncompromising. Rat and you easily misunderstand each other. Dog and you have very few things in common.

Monkey: 1932, 1944, 1956, 1968, 1980, 1992, 2004, 2016

Monkeys, you are at the top of your game this year. People notice your swagger and want to bask in your shine. Enjoy a spicier sex life whether you’re partnered or swinging around. Be careful of letting relationship issues affect your career performance. Protect your good time by keeping work and love life in balance.

Most compatible: Snake is either your hottest lover or your coldest foe. Rat cheers you up like no other. Dragon inspires you.

Least compatible: Tiger will fight you constantly. Pig doesn’t have the same interests and life goals as you.

Rooster: 1933, 1945, 1957, 1969, 1981, 1993, 2005, 2017

Roosters, protect your nest from troubles outside the home. You will encounter many struggles at work and in the world at large, but try not to let it leak into your conversations with lovers and potential lovers. Make your sexual and romantic encounters be an oasis from the harsh world outside.

Most compatible: Dragon’s accomplishments make you proud and you love to boost from behind. Snake gets you, your life and dreams. Ox is honest and a steady partner.

Least compatible: Rabbit has contrasting opinions that clash with yours. Dog and you can tolerate each other but it’s always tense. Who wants to live with all that tension? Other Roosters fight with you often and can’t compromise. Don’t get caught in a constant cockfight.

Dog: 1934, 1946, 1958, 1970, 1982, 1994, 2006, 2018

Dogs, you are such a friendly soul. If you are single, you will have plenty of friends who have the potential to develop into more intimate relationships. Single and partnered Dogs, be clear in your communication and listen well to avoid misunderstandings. Savor the love in store for your on this Year of the Water Rabbit.

Most compatible: Rabbit is kind and supportive. Tiger is reassuring and needs your loyalty. Horse understands and respects you.

Least compatible: Dragon and you are distrustful of one another. You will have intense arguments with each other. Ox and you have dissimilar interests. Goat and you tolerate each other, but that’s it.

Pig: 1935, 1947, 1959, 1971, 1983, 1995, 2007, 2019

Pigs, this is your moment to shine. Celebrate every chance you can. Single Pigs take the initiative when you meet someone you like. Partnered Pigs will fall even more deeply in love with your lovers. Cherish your lover. Have a fantastic year!

Most compatible: Tiger is brave and makes you feel secure. Rabbit wants to snuggle up and bask in your intelligence. You have a lot of common interests with Goat.

Least compatible: Snake will eat you alive. A relationship with Monkey will be full of tension.

Was my prediction for your zodiac sign helpful? Let me know in the comments what your sign is and what your love & sex game plan is going to be on this Year of the Water Rabbit. Good luck to you!

Love, Lust, and Liberty,

January 26, 2023
Cream pies are healthy 😋
I got my IUD removed. 🍑⚡️ It was a quick process and done before I knew it. Since it had been a year since my last period I figured that my ovulating days are probably over.

Doc said I have a nice pink cervix, healthy inner muscles, from getting regularly fucked and cum into. I still have strong orgasms that suck up every last drop of semen I get.

Which apparently is the best way to get natural hormone therapy. Let’s break it down:
- Average volume of semen per ejaculation: 1.5 to 5 mL
- Average amount of estrogen per 5 mL ejaculation: 2-3 mg
- Average amount of progesterone per 5 mL ejaculation: 50-70 mg
Compared to Hormone Replacement Therapy meds, that’s a lot more bang for my buck and a hell of a lot more fun.

So let’s keep getting it, my Golden Girls! Let your body bloom well into those senior years. Keep nurturing your sexual relationships. Stay healthy and stay sexy.

Cheers! 🍷
June 14, 2022
Let Your Body Bloom

I had an amazing time with journalist Ana P. Santos on her podcast titled Middle Me: Stories about Sex and Pleasure After 40. We talked about this rollercoaster ride I’m on from the moment I discovered my sexuality through decades of exploration in sex and relationships as a polyamorous pornographer.

Of course we talk about sex. We talk about porn. We talk about relationships. But also, we talk about family. And we talk about aging and body image. Have a listen.

Our interview is spread out over two episodes:

I also love that one of my longtime MAYCAM members, who happens to be a physician, reacted to this quote from the podcast:

“Physiologically, the reason you’re still ‘wet’ and not having issues with dryness nor menopausal symptoms is actually due to the ‘use it or lose it’ scenario. Believe it or not, i) the more skin-to-skin intercourse you have while going through menopause causes hypertrophy and healing to prevent vaginal wall atrophy (meaning if you were less sexually active, your vagina would start to atrophy); ii) high semen exposure inside the vagina stimulates high concentrations of estrogen, progesterone, and other important hormones to women. The vaginal wall and uterus absorbs estrogen 10x more effectively than if estrogen is given orally or even intravenously. Your ongoing sexual activity with vaginal creampies was doing the equivalent of prometrium (hormone replacement therapy directly to the vagina).”

So let’s get it, my Golden Girls! We owe it to ourselves and our lovers to let our sexual experience and emotional maturity bloom well into our senior years. We are not too old to have sex. It is natural and healthy to have mind blowing sex after menopause.

Cheers! 🍷

P.S. I made you a playlist for tonight. Gaze at the total lunar eclipse super flower moon while listening to these moon tunes on Spotify. 🌸

May 15, 2022
Is there sex after 40?

After “Is there life on Mars?” Gen-X women are asking google about sex. I answered some of them, but before you proceed, I want to remind you that I am not a doctor, sex therapist, or sex educator. My answers are based on my own personal experience of fucking a lot and fucking up a lot. Read on at your own risk.

How much sex should a 40-year-old woman have?

Throw “should’s” out of the window. Have as much or as little sex as you want. This includes self-pleasure.

How does your sex drive change at 40?

Every body is different. For me I became hyper-sexual, like I felt like I had to use it or lose it, like I was going to run out of sex appeal and I had to get as much sex as I could while I still could for fear of missing out. My husband and I were also going through a crisis in which we had to unpack all the emotional and sexual baggage that accumulated from 25 years of non-monogamous marriage while making more mistakes as we went along. (To cut a long story short, it was crazy and painful.) I am now approaching my 50s with temperance, and yes, still sexually active, but hopefully more sane about it.

Any cures for vaginal dryness? What is a good lubricant?

Most people would recommend lube, but I have a different take on this. I think it’s fine once in a while, but not habitually, not regularly, certainly not daily. Hear me out. Our bodies, if we are healthy and hydrated, should create as much moisture as we need. Using lube habitually may throw off our balance and trick our bodies into slowing down natural lubrication because our bodies think we are already wet enough. This also applies to moisturizers, lotions, and nutritional supplements. My suggestion to keep your vag (and the rest of your body) moist is to hydrate, hydrate, hydrate. Drink lots of water. Use old fashioned spit, your partner’s and yours, during foreplay. Between spit and your own pussy juice, you should be good to go. If your body is not quite there yet and you’re desperate for a good time, go for your kitchen (food-grade) coconut oil. Transfer a little bit of it to a different container, obviously, and take that to the bedroom with you. Food-grade because it’s better quality than the body product version of coconut oil. (The FDA does not regulate cosmetics and body products, including lube. That’s why I regard it with skepticism.) Good luck.

Can you still orgasm after menopause?

Yes, yes, yes!

Am I too old to try ___?

Today you’re younger than you’re ever going to be.
– Regina Spektor

Why can’t I get in the mood?

What’s really on your mind? Stress from work-related or relationship issues can be a dampener on fun and pleasure. Deal with those issues that are weighing heavily on your mind by talking it out or writing down an action plan. Often this is enough to allow yourself to relax and enjoy intimate moments.

Why do I get a bladder infection every time I have sex?

Bumping privates 🤣 can bring microscopic particles, microorganisms, and semen into our urethras which could cause infection. You need to pee after sex. Non-negotiable. No matter how sleepy you are, hoist yourself out of bed and go to the toilet.

How to increase your libido.

What makes you think that you need to increase your libido? Every body is different. Don’t judge your sexual needs against other people’s. Focus on connecting with your partner, not on how high or low your libido is.

My partner wants to have more sex than I do.

Have you considered opening up your relationship? Letting your partner hook up with someone else is just another way you can express love. Explore the concept of non-monogamy, figure out where your boundaries are, and communicate clearly with each other.

How to have sex when you’re tired.

Don’t. You need to rest when you’re tired. Do it when you have energy.

Everything in this photo is over 40. See the rest of this set at maycam.com

Ingat,

April 2, 2022
Love & Sex in the Chinese Year of the Water Tiger

Happy New Year! The Water Tiger symbolizes courage, strength, and renewal. But when it comes to love and sex, it is important to exercise tact, reserve, and care when expressing your affection. Respect your lover and respect yourself. Be mindful of what is essential. Don’t be distracted by momentary disagreements. Life is short. Memento mori. Choose love.

If you don’t already know which of the 12 zodiac animals you belong to, check the wheel below for the animal that corresponds to your birth year. If you were born on the month of January, it might get a little tricky for you. Since the Chinese go by the Lunar Calendar, some or all of January goes under the previous year’s sign. Here is a Chinese Animal Zodiac Sign Calculator to find out exactly what your sign is.

Do you know which animal zodiac sign you are? Then let me give you my Love & Sex Predictions for the coming Year of the Water Tiger.

Rat: 1924, 1936, 1948, 1960, 1972, 1984, 1996, 2008, 2020

Dear Rats, you will need all the luck you can scrounge up on this Year of the Water Tiger. Single Rats, play the field and hold off on making any commitments. Partnered Rats will need to work hard on relationships. Be more attentive to your lover’s needs. Watch for verbal and non-verbal cues for what would turn your lover on. Wear lucky colors red and blue to channel some good luck your way.

Most compatible signs: Ox is that strong sexy complement to your personality. Dragon and you have a lot in common. Monkey makes you so giddy happy.

Least compatible: Don’t hitch your wagon on Horse. Nothing you do will ever be good enough. Goat just wants your money. Rabbit can’t help but do the opposite of what you want. Beware!

Ox: 1925, 1937, 1949, 1961, 1973, 1985, 1997, 2009, 2021

Ox, your perseverance in the previous year will be rewarded soon. If you are single, keep your eyes peeled for The One and seize the moment. Wear lucky color yellow to boost your confidence. You got this. If you are partnered, you can expect a harmonious relationship this coming year, as long as you curb that tendency to overwork. Resist the idea that simply plowing your lover in bed late at night is sufficient. Be diligent in your foreplay to earn your reward.

Most compatible signs: Rat balances your rigid personality. Snake is romantic and supportive of your work. Rooster will love you with loyalty.

Least compatible: You will clash with Goat. Horse has too much of a free spirit to take you seriously. You have nothing in common with Dog. Don’t waste your time.

Tiger: 1926, 1938, 1950, 1962, 1974, 1986, 1998, 2010, 2022

Tigers, get ready for passion, intimacy, and juicy romance this year. If you are single, don’t be surprised if you suddenly get all kinds of hot sexy attention. If you are partnered, there will be a deepening of emotional understanding between you. Want to explore a new aspect of your sexuality? Trust that your partner will go there with you. Wear orange and black to make the most of that powerful Tiger energy.

Most compatible signs: Pig may be your opposite but you can really be yourselves with each other. Horse is irresistible to you. Dog brings out your gentle side.

Least compatible: Monkey and you will always argue. A relationship with Snake will be full of suspicions and coldness. Stay away.

Rabbit: 1927, 1939, 1951, 1963, 1975, 1987, 1999, 2011

Rabbits, what have you been hiding? It’s time to confess the passion and emotion in your heart to that special someone or you just might watch them disappear from your life. If you are partnered, you may want to spice things up but make sure you exercise care in how you express it. Assure your lover how much you care and want to share excitement together. Wear purple to increase your luck in love.

Most compatible: Dog will be happy to live a peaceful life with you. Pig and you have a lot in common. Goat needs you and you love taking care of that horny Goat.

Least compatible: Rooster and you will argue about the littlest things. Dragon and you may seem like you have a lot in common but alas, you two clash. Rat is tricky, too, because it will take time before differences between you will appear and by then, it will be impossible to agree on anything.

Dragon: 1928, 1940, 1952, 1964, 1976, 1988, 2000, 2012

Dragons, the Year of the Water Tiger will be a roller coaster ride of sexual exploits and experiences. Remember not to get too caught up in a whirlwind of emotions. Focus on improving communication for both single and partnered Dragons. Wear white to clarify your intentions. If you speak to your lover with respect, tact, and care, you can pretty much get everything you want.

Most compatible: Rooster worships you and will do anything for you. Monkey and you are a creative explosion together, just watch out for Monkey’s tricks. Rat’s humor and reliability attracts your stubborn nature.

Least compatible: You and Dog can’t understand or trust each other. Rabbit and you have similarities, but you can only tolerate each other to a certain point. You also clash with other Dragons. There can only be one!

Snake: 1941, 1953, 1965, 1977, 1989, 2001, 2013

Snakes, the Year of the Water Tiger will throw many unexpected twists your way. Partnered Snakes may get into misunderstandings. Single Snakes may be tempted to tangle with complicated ex-es. Stay grounded. Be clear about your motives. Put that sexy tongue to good use when speaking and when pleasuring your lover. Wear tangerine for luck.

Most compatible: Monkey and you have similarities. You admire Rooster’s good taste and ability to avoid getting eaten up by you. Ox grounds you and is a reliable anchor.

Least compatible: Tiger is too suspicious and cold. Pig will tolerate you, but can’t trust you. I mean, you’re a Snake! And admittedly, Pig is good eatin’!

Horse: 1942, 1954, 1966, 1978, 1990, 2002, 2014

Horses, stop overthinking and let your heart lead the way. Single horses end the loneliness this Year of the Water Tiger. Open yourself up to your sensual nature. If you are partnered, appreciate the effort your partner puts into your relationship and reciprocate! Go for a sexy ride together, maybe even a jaunt in the great outdoors. Feel the wind in your mane and the muscles in your body. Wearing red and blue is good for you.

Most compatible: Goat’s tenderness will make you feel content. Tiger will try hard to win you. Dog will be your loyal partner.

Least compatible: Rat will clash with you. Save yourselves the pain. Ox will be difficult to communicate with. Other Horses are great to work with but too similar to be compatible in love.

Goat: 1943, 1955, 1967, 1979, 1991, 2003, 2015

Goats, listen to the people you love. That means, family and friends. That also especially means your lover. The key to your happiness this Year of the Water Tiger lies in your ability to understand your lover’s needs. Don’t lock horns over minor disagreements. Is it really worth it? Honestly, train your ears to your lover’s voice and respond with a loving yes. Single Goats can look forward to unexpected flings this year so dress your best always (make sure your underwear is on point, too). Wear yellow for luck.

Most compatible: Horse makes up for your shortcomings, and vice versa. Rabbit is dependable. Pig is warm and gentle.

Least compatible: Ox and you can be so stubborn and uncompromising. Rat and you easily misunderstand each other. Dog and you have very few things in common.

Monkey: 1932, 1944, 1956, 1968, 1980, 1992, 2004, 2016

Monkeys, you are clearly the King and Queen of the swingers this coming year. Single Monkeys want passion and exploration, but no commitments. That’s all good as long as you communicate clearly with your fuck buddies or FWBs. That goes for partnered Monkeys as well. Trust is the currency of the swing set. Balance honesty with tact. Baby blue is your lucky color.

Most compatible: Snake is either your hottest lover or your coldest foe. Rat cheers you up like no other. Dragon inspires you.

Least compatible: Tiger will fight you constantly. Pig doesn’t have the same interests and life goals as you.

Rooster: 1933, 1945, 1957, 1969, 1981, 1993, 2005, 2017

Roosters, you are comfortable in your nest. You don’t want to change a thing. Partnered Roosters are smooth sailing. Single Roosters stay single, maybe even too preoccupied with work. But seriously, lift your head every so often and look around. Notice that one person that has been with you right from the start. That one who supports you and is there for you through thick or thin. At some point this year, you are going to have to fight for that person. Make sure you do. Wear yellow for luck.

Most compatible: Dragon’s accomplishments make you proud and you love to boost from behind. Snake gets you, your life and dreams. Ox is honest and a steady partner.

Least compatible: Rabbit has contrasting opinions that clash with yours. Dog and you can tolerate each other but it’s always tense. Who wants to live with all that tension? Other Roosters fight with you often and can’t compromise. Don’t get caught in a constant cockfight.

Dog: 1934, 1946, 1958, 1970, 1982, 1994, 2006, 2018

Dogs, take a leap of faith this Year of the Water Tiger. Let life surprise you with all its glory. Single Dogs bump into long lost friends. Partnered Dogs reignite the passion that drew them together in the first place. Take the time to reminisce about the good times. Make some new memories, perhaps even some sweet escapades to look back on with fondness. Wear an understated grey for luck.

Most compatible: Rabbit is kind and supportive. Tiger is reassuring and needs your loyalty. Horse understands and respects you.

Least compatible: Dragon and you are distrustful of one another. You will have intense arguments with each other. Ox and you have dissimilar interests. Goat and you tolerate each other, but that’s it.

Pig: 1935, 1947, 1959, 1971, 1983, 1995, 2007, 2019

Pigs, are you ready to move out of your comfort zone and reach for something new? Cast aside your doubts and take a chance on love. Trust that the stars are on your side. Single Pigs, I’m talking to you. Partnered Pigs, it is an auspicious year to tie the knot. Pigs in long term commitments, you may be curious about exploring polyamory. Communicate with care. Wear yellow for luck.

Most compatible: Tiger is brave and makes you feel secure. Rabbit wants to snuggle up and bask in your intelligence. You have a lot of common interests with Goat.

Least compatible: Snake will eat you alive. A relationship with Monkey will be full of tension.

Was my prediction for your zodiac sign helpful? Let me know in the comments what your sign is and what your love & sex game plan is going to be on this Year of the Water Tiger. Good luck to you! Roar!

Love, Lust, and Liberty,

February 1, 2022
I want it now.

I’m desperately craving a halo-halo right now. What I would give for a tall glass of it… I want a bean feast, the crunch of crushed ice, with creamy flan and ube ice cream topping. Don’t care how. I want it now.

I’d also love a green mango, tart and crisp, with bagoong. If not, I could eat a santol, the sour brown flesh first then the sweet white pulp in the center… I don’t remember the last time I’ve had one.

And duhat… I remember picking so much duhat from a tree that my fingers turned violet. So good… but so long since I last put one in my mouth.

Tell me, what are you craving for?

Love, Lust, & Liberty,

July 6, 2020
Nature Lover

Last summer I had a lovely time over Skype with Padmapani Perez and Rev. Joseph Santos-Lyons, hosts of Agam the Climate Podcast. They posted my interview and reading of my piece Power Couple for their Valentine’s Day episode.

For Valentine’s Day, listen to @maylingsu read her piece, Power Couple from Agam: Filipino Narratives on Uncertainty and Climate Change. #AgamtheClimatePodcast #AgamVoices https://t.co/cvz2ZVh6BZ
— The Agam Agenda (@theagamagenda) February 14, 2020

Have a listen on Spotify. We dish about the process of writing my piece in the book, Agam. I talk about the Lilith series and feminism. I share lifestyle changes I’ve made toward lowering my carbon footprint and mothering children who will continue to take care of our planet. I feel a little sheepish now listening to myself talk about Greta Thunberg as if no one has ever heard of her, but this was before she sailed across the Atlantic and became a climate change superstar so ignore my over-explaining who she is and enjoy the rest of the conversation.

The folks at Agam honored me with four tree seedlings for this interview and I couldn’t be more proud of it.

Toward the end of the interview Padma asked what I foresee for the adult industry in the face of climate change and I gave a vague answer about being able to adapt as we always have, which is true. The adult industry has always been an early adopter and on the forefront of trends and tech. But here is a more specific way porn is addressing environmental crises.

Sexecology, a form of environmental activism by porn performance artist Annie Sprinkle and her partner, Elizabeth Stephens, combines education and activism in live performances to get people to care for the earth the way one cares for a lover.

Perhaps you’ve been skinny dipping, had sex in the great outdoors, and fucked yourself with vegetables. I have. I’ve eaten fruit so good they made me moan. I’ve straddled tree trunks and hugged their limbs. Rain and snow, lightning and thunder puts me in a horny mood.

What about you? The natural world is a sensual delight. Tell me about your erotic experience in nature. What do you do to let her know you love her?

Love, Lust, and Liberty,

February 16, 2020
Love & Sex in the Chinese Year of the Rat

In old Chinese culture, the Rat was considered a symbol of fertility, as well as one of abundance. Let’s see if the Year of the Rat promises a whole lot of love and sex for you.

If you don’t already know which of the 12 zodiac animals you belong to, check the wheel below for the animal that corresponds to your birth year. If you were born on the month of January, it might get a little tricky for you. Since the Chinese go by the Lunar Calendar, the earlier part of January goes under the previous year’s sign. If you were born during the latter half of January, here’s a Chinese Animal Zodiac Sign Calculator to find out exactly what your sign is.

Now that we’ve got that sorted, let me give you my Love & Sex Predictions for each zodiac sign.

Rat: 1924, 1936, 1948, 1960, 1972, 1984, 1996, 2008, 2020

This may be your year, but you will face many struggles in your relationships. Stay positive through difficult times. Confront issues directly with tact. Have fun, but not at the expense of your health. Your body is your temple. Love yourself. Meditate.

Most compatible signs: Ox is that strong sexy complement to your personality. Dragon and you have a lot in common. Monkey makes you so giddy happy.

Least compatible: Don’t hitch your wagon on Horse. Nothing you do will ever be good enough. Goat just wants your money. Rabbit can’t help but do the opposite of what you want. Beware!

Ox: 1925, 1937, 1949, 1961, 1973, 1985, 1997, 2009, 2021

Communication is key for you this year, as it is always. Listen and pay attention. Your partner may turn to someone else if you are unwilling to see things beyond your own point of view. Surprise yourself by trying new things in bed.

Most compatible signs: Rat balances your rigid personality. Snake is romantic and supportive of your work. Rooster will love you with loyalty.

Least compatible: You will clash with Goat. Horse has too much of a free spirit to take you seriously. You have nothing in common with Dog. Don’t waste your time.

Tiger: 1926, 1938, 1950, 1962, 1974, 1986, 1998, 2010, 2022

Keep your friends with benefits close. It may turn to something more, but not this year. Go on blind dates with no expectations. If you are already partnered, be genuine but show your best self always.

Most compatible signs: Pig may be your opposite but you can really be yourselves with each other. Horse is irresistible to you. Dog brings out your gentle side.

Least compatible: Monkey and you will always argue. A relationship with Snake will be full of suspicions and coldness. Stay away.

Rabbit: 1927, 1939, 1951, 1963, 1975, 1987, 1999, 2011, 2023

Peach blossom luck is with you this year. You are irresistible! Everyone has the hots for you, particularly that one you’ve been lusting on for the last few months. Make your move! Watch out for betrayal or jealousy from someone close to you. Don’t get distracted from what you want in love and life.

Most compatible: Dog will be happy to live a peaceful life with you. Pig and you have a lot in common. Goat needs you and you love taking care of that horny Goat.

Least compatible: Rooster and you will argue about the littlest things. Dragon and you may seem like you have a lot in common but alas, you two clash. Rat is tricky, too, because it will take time before differences between you will appear and by then, it will be impossible to agree on anything.

Dragon: 1928, 1940, 1952, 1964, 1976, 1988, 2000, 2012, 2024

Luck in career is on your side this year. Don’t worry about putting love and sex off to the sidelines for the moment to focus on growing your career. Prioritize your personal growth. Independence is essential to a healthy relationship.

Most compatible: Rooster worships you and will do anything for you. Monkey and you are a creative explosion together, just watch out for Monkey’s tricks. Rat’s humor and reliability attracts your stubborn nature.

Least compatible: You and Dog can’t understand or trust each other. Rabbit and you have similarities, but you can only tolerate each other to a certain point. You also clash with other Dragons. There can only be one!

Snake: 1941, 1953, 1965, 1977, 1989, 2001, 2013, 2025

Explore the mucky muck of your emotions this year. Knowing and loving yourself is the foundation of strong relationships. You can’t share what you don’t have so nurture yourself, keep the fire of your desires alive, share it uninhibitedly with your partner.

Most compatible: Monkey and you have similarities. You admire Rooster’s good taste and ability to avoid getting eaten up by you. Ox grounds you and is a reliable anchor.

Least compatible: Tiger is too suspicious and cold. Pig will tolerate you, but can’t trust you. I mean, you’re a Snake! And admittedly, Pig is good eatin’!

Horse: 1942, 1954, 1966, 1978, 1990, 2002, 2014, 2026

Pay it forward this year with random acts of kindness. Consider taking dance classes to get in touch with your body in new ways. Bonus points for taking partnered dancing classes, such as the tango. Remember to bring the lessons of the dance floor to bed with you.

Most compatible: Goat’s tenderness will make you feel content. Tiger will try hard to win you. Dog will be your loyal partner.

Least compatible: Rat will clash with you. Save yourselves the pain. Ox will be difficult to communicate with. Other Horses are great to work with but too similar to be compatible in love.

Goat: 1943, 1955, 1967, 1979, 1991, 2003, 2015, 2027

If you are single, this year is for a few one-time flings or short-term relationships in between long periods of being alone. Don’t worry about it. Focus on your friendships. If you are partnered, how about an exotic vacation to reignite your senses out of ordinary life?

Most compatible: Horse makes up for your shortcomings, and vice versa. Rabbit is dependable. Pig is warm and gentle.

Least compatible: Ox and you can be so stubborn and uncompromising. Rat and you easily misunderstand each other. Dog and you have very few things in common.

Monkey: 1932, 1944, 1956, 1968, 1980, 1992, 2004, 2016

You are a beacon of fun and intelligence. You will have your pick of partners and have a swinging time. If you are already partnered, your relationship will be rock-solid this year, and even though it won’t be that exciting, you’ll barely notice.

Most compatible: Snake is either your hottest lover or your coldest foe. Rat cheers you up like no other. Dragon inspires you.

Least compatible: Tiger will fight you constantly. Pig doesn’t have the same interests and life goals as you.

Rooster: 1933, 1945, 1957, 1969, 1981, 1993, 2005, 2017

This year will have plenty of opportunities for hookups for you. It could be any moment, so make sure you’re ready. Stay clean and well-groomed at all times so you make a positive impression. Partnered cocks may find interest outside of your current relationships. Consider polyamory.

Most compatible: Dragon’s accomplishments make you proud and you love to boost from behind. Snake gets you, your life and dreams. Ox is honest and a steady partner.

Least compatible: Rabbit has contrasting opinions that clash with yours. Dog and you can tolerate each other but it’s always tense. Who wants to live with all that tension? Other Roosters fight with you often and can’t compromise. Don’t get caught in a constant cockfight.

Dog: 1934, 1946, 1958, 1970, 1982, 1994, 2006, 2018

You are warm and friendly. Relationships come naturally for you. If you are single, love is already within your close circle of friends. Sniff it out and cuddle up. Partnered dogs will stay in strong relationships. In moments of weakness, focus on the good in your partner.

Most compatible: Rabbit is kind and supportive. Tiger is reassuring and needs your loyalty. Horse understands and respects you.

Least compatible: Dragon and you are distrustful of one another. You will have intense arguments with each other. Ox and you have dissimilar interests. Goat and you tolerate each other, but that’s it.

Pig: 1935, 1947, 1959, 1971, 1983, 1995, 2007, 2019

You will have the best luck in love and sex out of all the signs this year. Go with this mojo. Be open about your sexual preferences, your kinks, your turn-ons. They can’t love you if they don’t know you. Be unapologetically yourself and you will attract the partner/s you need.

Most compatible: Tiger is brave and makes you feel secure. Rabbit wants to snuggle up and bask in your intelligence. You have a lot of common interests with Goat.

Least compatible: Snake will eat you alive. A relationship with Monkey will be full of tension.

Was my prediction for your zodiac sign helpful? Let me know in the comments what your sign is and what your love & sex game plan is going to be on this Year of the Metal Rat. Good luck to you!

Love, Lust, and Liberty,

February 9, 2020
Dear Idiot, or Why I Won’t Reply to your Email, PM, DM, Snap, etc.

Mail time!

I’m posting this email because it is the most articulate of many along the same vein of the classic one-liner “Hey.” This one really nails the motivation behind unsolicited dick pics:

Hello May Ling,

I hope you are well. I know it sounds a unrealistic to imagine that I would actually receive a reply from you but at least there is spark of hope if I write you again. I wrote you a couple of weeks ago and you were kind enough to send me links to your website and some adult content, but I am really just interested in you as a person. I am not suggesting that we meet in person or exchange photos or any type of webcam interaction but just an exchange of ideas and a little more insight into your fascinating mind.

Thanks,
Ray

The truth is you don’t really want an insight into my mind. If you did, you would be a MAYCAM member. You would have bought and read my books. You would be subscribed to my blog and following me on social media.

What you want is my attention. My time devoted to only you. A virtual mind space where we can be alone together.

I get it. You don’t want to be just another “like” in the social media crowd, just another subscriber, just another passive reader. You want me to respond to you. You want to be visible. You want me to validate your existence as a unique and special individual.

So you send me email and private messages.

You don’t realize that you are being selfish. You want me to spend time on you, but you’re not willing to pay.

It took me years to figure it out. I was treating myself like just another internet marketer peddling adult content in a saturated market and competing against younger, more beautiful, smarter women for your attention. I was paying it forward, giving away porn and passwords. I wore myself out trying to answer “Thanks for accepting my friend request. What do you like about me?” until it hit me:

Hey, Ding Dong. I don’t want anything you have to sell. I just want your soul!

Holy shit!

My time and attention is a limited supply. The demand for it easily exceeds what I have to go around. By the laws of supply and demand alone, my time and attention is worth more than yours. I can’t just give it away to anyone who sends me an email or private message. Special mention to the dude who sent me a long rambling talking head video then called me rude when my response was short.

If you want my attention, earn it.

Become a MAYCAM Member. It’s my personal diary, in which I share the ups and downs of every cock and pussy I’ve had the pleasure to meet, my innermost thoughts, my naughtiest secrets. MAYCAM Members get my attention because they take care of me, support me, invest in me. All the cherry blossoms go to my MAYCAM Members.

And then some more cherry blossoms for you if you…

Buy my books. Review them on Amazon or GoodReads or your own social media channel. You have no idea how much that means to me.

Buy something from my Wishlist or send me an Amazon gift card. I may surprise you back.

Sign up for my May Ling List. Comment on my blog entries on the blog. Follow me on social media. Like, share, retweet, and comment on my posts. Public displays of your affection for me contribute to the furtherance of my brand. I see you. I appreciate it.

Until then, my time and attention belong to the people who recognize its value enough to bring me value in return. Many have been doing it for years. Get in line.

Love, Lust, and Liberty,

April 26, 2019